I’ll Bet You Thought That You were just a Regular Guy

I ran across something that made me wonder just how many others have realized the same things and felt the same way.  I’d love to tell you that I was just incredibly brilliant and came up with this list on my own, but honestly I don’t know who created this, but it was a comment on some article I’d read.  The person who added the comment was using a pseudonym, so they are unknown, but I think we should all thank him(or her).


I used to think I was just a regular guy, but I was born white, which now, whether I like it or not, makes me a racist and responsible for slavery.

I am a fiscal and moral conservative, which by today’s standards,
makes me a fascist because I plan and support myself.

I went to HS, worked through college, got a degree and have held a
job and am here not because I earned it but because I was advantaged.

I am heterosexual, which according to gay folks, now makes me a

I am not a Muslim, which now labels me as an infidel.

I believe in the 2nd Amendment, which now makes me a member of the
vast NRA gun lobby.

I am older than 50, which makes me a useless old man
who doesn’t understand Facebook.

I think and I reason, therefore I doubt much that the main stream
media tells me, which must make me a reactionary.

I am proud of my heritage and our inclusive American culture,
which makes me a xenophobe.

I value my safety and that of my family and I appreciate the
police and the legal system, which makes me a right-wing, cop loving extremist.

I believe in hard work, fair play, and fair compensation according
to each individual’s merits, which today makes me an anti-socialist.

I believe that our system guarantees of freedom of effort – not
freedom of outcome or subsidies which must make me a borderline sociopath.

I believe in the defense and protection of the homeland for and by
all citizens, which now makes me a militant.

I am proud of our flag, what it stands for and the many who died
to let it fly so I stand and salute during our National Anthem which takes me
back to where I started – I must be a racist.

Please help me come to terms with the new me… because I’m just not
sure who I am anymore!

I would like to thank all my friends for sticking with me through
these abrupt, new found changes in my life and my thinking!

I just can’t imagine or understand what’s happened to me so

Funny …it’s all just taken place over the last 7 or 8 years!

About Jim Yardley

Retired after 30 years as a financial controller for a variety of manufacturing firms, a two-tour Vietnam veteran, and independent voter.
This entry was posted in Humor, Observing Our Culture, Political Doubletalk, Progressives and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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